A block away, on Sunday morning.Good Friday 2011

I was looking forward to the Good Friday service at our church this year because our entire family had planned on sharing the evening together. Good Friday service at Grace Church is always meaningful and significant, this year I had high hopes because our entire family had recently begun to worship together regularly.  The auditorium was filled with,  I donít know maybe three or four thousand people all focusing our thoughts on Jesus and what he had done for us on the cross. Little did we know that there was a storm brewing all around us as we worshiped singing some of our favorite songs.  Time came for us to share communion and the lights flickered as we lost power. About a minute later the lights came back on, only to go off again-for good. Immediately the backup lighting came on giving us some illumination.  For the first time in my life I saw a police officer walk down the aisle of the church and go straight up and talk to our Pastor. A battery powered megaphone speaker was given to Pastor Ron and he instructed us to drop down between the pews and to duck our heads.  It became quiet for a moment in the dimmed light and then a voice from down in the pews started to sing. ďAmazing Grace how sweet the soundÖ.Ē Soon we were all singing from our crouched positions between the pews. Waiting.

Frankly I had all sorts of mixed feelings. Tornado warnings happen all the time in Missouri and I wondered if we were simply being overly cautious, but I kept looking up expecting to see the roof blow off and I prepared myself for the end. Actually I was ready, I know that sounds dismal but I had my entire family in Godís house and I figured if he wanted to take us all home this was a pretty good way to go.

So close...We passed the time singing songs of praise and when the tornado warning had expired we were informed that the area surrounding the church was a mess. Many roads were blocked and it would be difficult to maneuver out on the streets.  Exiting the building I could see rows of headlights parked on the highways. Car after car lined up as far as I could see and they were not moving. Our family decided to head west to Chesterfield avoiding all the congestion.  I immediately started to Google for information on my phone and we turned on the radio finding out just how bad the damage was.  From what I understand a big auditorium on high ground is not where you want to be when a tornado rolls through and later we saw the swath of destruction that was merely a block away from our church.

Lately Iíve been struggling with trust, specifically trusting God. Oh, I believe and love Him; however I was having a difficult time accepting some of what was happening in my life. God was not answering my prayers in the manner that I expected, actually the answer I got was a crisis and like a spoiled child I couldnít understand why God would allow this. I didnít get it. Why? Not just in my personal chaos, but the whole crucifixion of Jesus, why? Couldnít there have been another answer? The tornado swept by and thatís when I got it. Inside that auditorium I couldnít see what was going on. I only heard bits and pieces. The whole scope of the event didnít sink in until I saw the aerial video from the helicopter on the news the next morning. Same with my life and my predicament, I only have access to bits and pieces of the whole picture and this is where faith comes in. If all your questions are answered, itís simply truth, there is no faith. But when your whyís are unanswered, then it is faith.

ďTrust the Lord with all your heart and lean not to your own understandingĒ Proverbs 3:5